Al-Shifa was a dream and a nightmare | Israel-Palestine conflict

After I began finding out nursing at Al Azhar College, I knew I wished to work at al-Shifa Hospital. It was my dream.

It was the largest, most prestigious hospital within the Gaza Strip. A few of the greatest docs and nurses in Palestine labored there. Varied international medical missions would come and supply coaching and care there as effectively.

Many individuals from the north to the south of the Gaza Strip sought medical assist at al-Shifa. The title of the hospital means “therapeutic” in Arabic and certainly, it was a spot of therapeutic for the Palestinians of Gaza.

In 2020, I graduated from nursing faculty and tried to discover a job within the personal sector. After a number of short-term jobs, I acquired into al-Shifa as a volunteer nurse.

I cherished my job on the emergency division very a lot. I went to work with ardour and optimistic vitality day-after-day. I’d meet sufferers with a large smile, hoping to alleviate a few of their ache. I all the time cherished to listen to sufferers’ prayers for me in gratitude.

Within the emergency division, we have been 80 nurses in complete – each ladies and men – and we have been all pals. The truth is, a few of my closest pals have been colleagues on the hospital. Alaa was certainly one of them. We did shifts collectively and went out for espresso exterior of labor. She was a lovely lady who was very type and cherished by everybody.

It was such friendships and the comradery among the many workers that helped me pull by when the warfare began.

From the very first day, the hospital turned overwhelmed with casualties. After my first shift ended that day, I stayed within the nurses’ room crying for an hour over every little thing we had been by and all of the injured individuals I had seen struggling.

Inside days there have been greater than a thousand wounded and martyrs within the hospital. The extra individuals have been introduced in, the more durable we labored, making an attempt to avoid wasting lives.

I by no means anticipated that this horror would final for greater than a month. However it did.

Quickly, the Israeli military referred to as my household and informed us that we would have liked to go away our residence in Gaza Metropolis. I confronted a troublesome alternative: to be with my household on this horrific time or to be with the sufferers who wanted me essentially the most. I made a decision to remain.

I bid farewell to my household who fled south to Rafah and I stayed behind in al-Shifa Hospital, which turned my second residence. Alaa stayed behind as effectively. We supported and comforted one another.

In early November, the Israeli military informed us to evacuate the hospital and laid a siege to it. Our medical provides began to dwindle. We have been shortly working out of gas for our electrical energy turbines that have been preserving life-saving gear going.

Maybe essentially the most heartbreaking second was after we ran out of gas and oxygen and we may now not hold the untimely infants we had in our care within the incubators. We needed to relocate them to an working room the place we tried to maintain them heat. They have been struggling to breathe and we had no oxygen to assist them. We misplaced eight harmless infants. I bear in mind sitting and crying for a very long time that day for these harmless souls.

Then on November 15, Israeli troopers stormed the advanced. The assault got here as a shock. As a medical facility, it was purported to be protected underneath worldwide legislation, however that clearly didn’t cease the Israeli military.

Simply earlier than the raid, our administration informed us that they’d obtained a name that the Israelis have been about to storm the medical advanced. We shortly closed the gate of the emergency division and gathered inside across the nursing desk in the course of it, not figuring out what to do. The following day, we noticed Israeli troopers surrounding the constructing. We couldn’t depart and we have been working out of medical provides. We struggled to supply therapy to the sufferers we had with us.

We had no meals or water left. I bear in mind feeling dizzy and nearly fainting. I had not eaten something for 3 days. We misplaced some sufferers due to the siege and the Israeli raid.

On November 18, Dr Mohammad Abu Salmiya, al-Shifa’s director, got here to inform us that the Israelis had ordered the entire medical advanced to be evacuated. If I had a alternative, I’d have stayed, however the Israeli military didn’t depart me one.

A whole lot of us, docs and nurses, have been compelled to go away, together with many sufferers. Solely about two dozen workers stayed behind with bed-ridden sufferers who couldn’t be moved. Dr Abu Salmiya additionally stayed behind and was arrested a number of days later. He disappeared for the subsequent seven months.

I, together with dozens of colleagues head south per Israeli orders. Alaa and some others defied these orders and headed north to their households. We walked for a lot of kilometres and handed Israeli checkpoints, the place we have been made to attend for hours, till we have been capable of finding a donkey cart that might transport us a number of the manner.

After we lastly arrived in Rafah, I used to be past joyful to see my household. There was numerous crying and aid. However the happiness of being with my household was quickly overshadowed by surprising information.

Alaa was capable of return to her household in Beit Lahiya, who had been displaced in a college shelter. However when she and her brother went to their deserted home to retrieve some belongings, an Israeli missile hit the constructing they usually have been martyred.

The information of her loss of life got here as an infinite shock. A 12 months later, I nonetheless stay with the ache of shedding my shut buddy – one of many sweetest individuals I had ever identified who cherished to assist others and who was all the time there to consolation me in troublesome moments.

In March, Israeli troopers returned to al-Shifa. For 2 weeks, they rampaged by the hospital, abandoning loss of life and devastation. Not a constructing was left within the medical advanced that was not broken or burned down. From a spot of therapeutic, al-Shifa was remodeled right into a graveyard.

I have no idea how I’ll really feel after I see the hospital once more. How will I really feel figuring out that the place of my greatest skilled achievements and dearest moments shared with colleagues additionally turned a spot of loss of life, compelled disappearances and displacement?

At the moment, greater than a 12 months after I misplaced my office, I stay in a tent and take care of the in poor health in a makeshift clinic. My future, our future is unsure. However within the new 12 months, I’ve a dream: to see al-Shifa because it was once – grand and delightful.

The views expressed on this article are the writer’s personal and don’t essentially mirror Al Jazeera’s editorial stance.